Memory is an Enemy

Memory is an Enemy

words: Finn Butler

Beautiful Sadness

Beautiful Sadness

words: Finn Butler

Fangirl

Konoha Shinobi

Some days, I just feel like posting photos of myself.

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The Narrow Sea in Which Their Minds Dwell

I don’t believe in sexual stereotypes. I believe in people.

Sex is a matter of biology; that thing between your legs, that’s sex. Gender is a matter of social role.  It is mostly dictated by your brain: the brain decides what gender you identify with, whether you feel as a man, woman, both, or neither. That’s very uncomfortable when there are a million people in the world who insists on calling you a man just because of the body you happen to be uncomfortable with.

Sex shouldn’t determine the pronouns you should use, gender should.   And your sex shouldn’t define your gender. I admire people who deviate from the supposed gender roles they have to take on.  I have lots of friends whose gender roles don’t match with their genitals, and I don’t see anything wrong with that. Okay, some people might argue that homosexuality is the product of the devil, but isn’t it crazy to associate something that they don’t understand with the devil? I find it totally ridiculous how people condemn something they don’t even understand.

I don’t believe in sexual stereotypes. I choose my friends based on who they are as people.

What I don’t understand is the people’s presumed impossibility of a friendship between a heterosexual and homosexual, or a friendship between a heterosexual and bisexual.  Please forgive me for being stupid but I don’t understand why people insist on thinking that, when two people who have different gender preference are always together as they are friends , there must be something going on.  In what book is it written that it’s impossible to be friends with someone with a totally different sexual orientation and gender preference?  Can someone please enlighten me because I might have missed the announcement that friendship also needs to cope with the rapid changes and developments in the information technology?

Is it impossible to be just friends with someone who’s biologically just like me, but has a different gender preference?  Just. I don’t want to use this word when I refer to a friend. Just a friend. No. I take the words friend, friends, friendship with deadly seriousness, and my friends are not just friends. They’re not only friends.  Oh, I know you get what I mean.

Why are friends the commodity on which we should ultimately be judged?  What if you have none? What if you only have a selected few? Are you less to them because you’d rather be alone than with the people you’re  surrounded with? Are you less of a person because you’d rather be with with a selected few people because there is not one single like-minded person anywhere in your vicinity?

It’s funny how the people who don’t understand, people who don’t know any better, have so much to say.

I choose my friends. I am friends with my friends because I really like to be with them, and I like the me when I’m with them. I am friends with my friends, straight or not, not to make a fashion statement.

My self-confidence doesn’t depend on the opinion of others.

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It Takes A Man and A(/n Other) Woman

Summary

It Takes A Man and A Woman takes place two years after the long distance relationship of Miggy (John Lloyd Cruz) and Laida (Sarah Geronimo) fails.

Two years back, Laida was working in New York when her parents separated (though temporarily) and Miggy’s father died of a heart attack. Laida’s mother went to New York to seek Laida’s comfort and Miggy called to tell her he needs her.  Knowing she can’t be in two places at once, Laida apologized to her mother for wanting to go back to the Philippines to console Miggy; and go back to the Philippines, she did.

Only to find Miggy kissing his ex-girlfriend Belle (Isabelle Daza).

Laida went back to New York not giving Miggy the chance to explain no matter how much the latter tries to but what is there to explain? duh? It doesn’t take a genius to understand what’s going on and does he take Laida for a stupid little gi.

Now, two years after they have broken up, Miggy and Laida had to work together for a special project.

Miggy has Belle. Laida has her fashion sense, New York accent and connections that they don’t have.

Things are never meant to be the same.

It Takes A Man and A Woman is directed by Cathy Garcia-Molina and is co produced by Viva Films and Star Cinema.

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Review:

The actors/actresses played their roles in such a realistic manner, you couldn’t tell they’re just actually playing a role.

For starters, I like the characters of Zoila and friends (Matet de Leon as Zoila, Joross Gamboa as John Rae, and Guji Lorenzana as Carlo), injecting appropriate punchlines  at the appropriate timing.

Sarah Geronimo is just so natural. You can’t tell whether she’s acting or it’s just how she is off-cam. John Lloyd Cruz is still that boy-next-door goody-two-shoes actor, inspite of all the mature roles he had taken on some of his recent TV series and movies.

I like how the movie was not rushed. I like how the ending of the movie was not premature.

It Takes A Man and A Woman presented the reality of a long distance relationship. No matter how the other claims to be faithful, sooner or later, s/he bound to hurt the other by betraying her/his trust. Everybody, as in everybody, is bound to hurt you: it’s just a matter of how and when.

No matter what the shortcomings of the other person are, it is not a license to cheat on them.  Whether or not the other person inflicted the pain on the other on purpose the result is the same. I wanted to slap Miggy so hard it’ll dislocate his skull. How could he stand there and tell Laida he’s sorry? It’s meaningless. How could he propose to Laida just so she’ll  accept his apology? Did he really think that ring’s gonna change a thing? Meaningless. And if that’s meaningless what else have you said to her that’s meaningless?

The movie also presented the reality that humans, no matter how good we try to be, are bound to make mistakes. We are bound to fail the people we love and the people who love us no matter how we try not to fall short of the person they want us to be. Humans are not perfect, so either we forgive them for their shortcomings or hold it against them and risk not being happy.

The movie, as typical of the most Filipino movies, is predictable.

Of course, Laida and Miggy will still be together, in the end. Who doesn’t like a happy ending? Who doesn’t like a movie which allows people to believe that people who have broken up and hurt each other in the past can still set things straight and be happy with each other once again?

But what most people fail to acknowledge is this: if the relationship didn’t work before, why would it work now? But then again, who am I to rain on their parade? Oh, well, let’s just thank God for movies: it’s the only place where love exists, next to music and a a good book.

Jessica Zafra said, “we go to movies because sometimes our lives feel like a trap and we need ro escape into someone else’s life for an hour or so. ”  Yes. We watch movies because the world is a scary place and the world is not everything that it is and should be. We go to the movies because even when we’re enveloped in the darkness of the cinema, we can imagine, we can re-write our own stories, we can make corrections.

We watch movies of this sort because we ache for something that is happy; something that is more inspiring, just bigger than the daily struggle to survive.

We hope to find in cinema the grandeur that is missing in our lives…

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